If you are one of many new daters in an older age group who are looking to prepare for dating, then you may be feeling anxious about getting out there again. To help, we’ve compiled useful information to get you started.
In this article, we’ve prepared details on what you can expect as you go out there looking for a soulmate based on compatibility, shared interests, and more. Read on to learn more about what you can expect when dating as you age.
What can you expect from dating as a senior
For starters, dating as a senior is nothing like it was like in high school. As someone who is older now, you’ve got a lot more life experience under your belt, as well as a better grasp on what you want out of a relationship when meeting people.
But finding love has changed in some fairly fundamental ways thanks to the rise of online dating sites and mobile apps for phones. Add to that differences in what you can expect out of intimacy and the greater role of companionship, and dating is a much different beast.
However, your chances of finding love later in life are substantially better than you might think. To give you some insight into what you can expect, we’ve focused on those three areas first and foremost:
Online Dating sites and apps
Many older adults may be using online dating sites for the first time as they try to find a partner for a serious relationship. There’s no doubt that it’s much different than how you may be familiar with it, but connecting with other senior singles online has proven to be effective.
So effective, in fact, that it is actually one of the number one ways that people of all ages meet up for the first time with a romantic partner. The flexibility and ease of finding local singles who are compatible with you is a real convenience.
Even more so when you consider that there are quite a few seniors who might not be able to go out looking for dating opportunities anyway.
You may think that these services are a little confusing or difficult to use, but that’s really not the case. With a little use, you can see that they are actually designed to be simple to use either from the comfort of your own home or while on the go with your mobile device.
They aren’t the only way for you to meet a romantic partner, but dating sites have nevertheless become the best chance for many people to meet new romantic partners, companions, and potential friends.
To boot, they also offer great communities centered on many different aspects of senior living, from dating and relationships to activities, special interests and more.
Intimacy
Intimacy is naturally a different aspect of dating as an older person, as sex loses some of the driving force that it had when you were younger. This isn’t to say there isn’t intimacy, as senior women tend to have an increased libido, but the nature of intimacy changes.
Of course, navigating when you should first kiss or make a move for sex can still be as tricky as when you were younger. However, your fulfillment isn’t going to rely just on physical intimacy.
You and potential partners may find that your dating experience shifts toward romance and being together on an emotionally intimate level, bonding in ways that aren’t just physical. You will of course still have sex, although older men may need a little help with that.
Companionship
For older people, more so than sex, companionship is something that gains a lot of value in a relationship. Knowing that there will be someone with similar interests and concerns, experiences and hopes, is a powerful driving force toward defining a relationship.
This also extends beyond a one-to-one relationship, as finding friends and communities that you can be a part of is also related to the companionship many seek as they get older. As you begin to look for a romantic partner, you’ll find more people to share your time with, too.
You’ll also come to appreciate that as well, if you haven’t already.
What to expect on your first date
If this is your first time playing the dating game in a while, you probably need to shake the rust off. Expect to spend a lot of time on your first date getting to know each other, learning about each other, and so on. If it goes well, you may even exchange phone numbers.
You should also prepare yourself to be a little awkward, but don’t worry about it. If it’s the first time for the both of you dating in a while, you both may need to spend some time getting your footing.
Just make sure you don’t panic or rush anything. Take your time and get to know each other. Be polite and don’t make too much physical contact until you’re both comfortable with each other.
Because a first date is really about getting to know someone, it’s best to take your date to someplace where you can chat and really get to know each other. A nice bar or lounge, a café, or even the tried-and-true restaurant for a nice dinner out are all good choices.
Some of the obstacles that older men and women may face in the dating world
The dating scene can have many perks for people specific to each age group, but it can also have its fair share of disadvantages. For example, while the number of places a younger man can take a date might be more, older men may have more resources to enjoy nicer venues.
That isn’t all though, as many seniors feel awkward dating at an older age, and can feel unsure if they’re right for it or not. Feeling uncertain or doubting yourself can in turn be a turn off for a potential date and sour the mood a bit if it isn’t corrected.
Of course, either you or your partner may not be physically capable of being out for long or in any places that require a lot of mobility. You may even need to find a way to date one another while one or both of you are in a senior citizen’s home, although it is more than possible.
If either of you have family, which is likely, it can be a tense situation if they aren’t comfortable with you dating someone, especially if your spouse passed away and they haven’t come to terms with it yet.
Take your time and let them adjust to your situation, and stand with your decision. Your happiness is important, so don’t let them try to convince you that finding another partner is out of the question.
Why dating as a senior is better than ever before
For both older women and men, dating as a senior has the advantage of both partners having a considerable amount of life experience. You and your partner will have led fulfilling lives and know what you both want out of a relationship.
You also have financial resources to spend on enjoying yourselves and time. You can explore your hobbies together and spend your time in the way that you want. Your odds of finding love later in life actually go up, when you think about it!
There’s also the benefit of companionship and focusing your efforts on more than sex and trying to find out what you both want. Since there’s a clear understanding of what you are looking for, there’s no need to waste time wondering.
Dating advice for single seniors to help you find the right person
For dating tips on finding your ideal partner, it’s best to first consider your own situation first. What do you want out of a relationship? What are your interests and what kinds of interests would you ideally like your partner to have? Are you comfortable dating now?
Don’t worry too much about the dating rules that modern daters use. Focus instead on enjoying yourself and your own comfort, but don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and take a chance on meeting someone new.
Finally, don’t rush as you date. You don’t need to find a soulmate right away, and you don’t even need to start going out on dates the first day you decide to go on a date. Take your time and find a partner that’s best for you.
FAQ on what Seniors should expect as they date
Seniors getting started with dating can feel overwhelmed by all the changes that have gone on in the world of matchmaking since their younger days. To help you feel more secure and comfortable starting off, we’ve answered the most frequently asked questions.
Can you find love and get married at 60 or older?
Which dating websites are best for long-term relationships for seniors?
eHarmony, Elitesingles, Ourtime, SilverSingles
How to stay safe while dating online as a senior
These people are called catfishers, which is just one of a number of dating slang seniors may want to familiarize themselves with.
The best way to keep yourself safe is to then avoid giving anyone you meet online any information that includes your private information, personal data, or any money whatsoever. Even if you think you know them pretty well, don’t risk it! Better to be safe than sorry.
When you do meet someone up for a date, you should also tell a friend or relative where you are going, when you are going there, and who you are meeting up. Meet in a public place and always keep a backup way to get yourself out of there if it goes south, like a fake phone call.